Is the Break-Up Rate for Long Distance Couples the Same for Other Couples?

So you’re in long distance relationship. It’s one of the best relationships you’ve had so far – loving, caring, passionate, incredibly sweet. You actually call yourself lucky everyday. But in your gut, there seems to be that nagging feeling that you and your loved one may not be having a great deal. There’s the distance, the decrease in physical intimacy and the temptation to cheat. Are you worried that the break-up rate for long distance couples are the same with other couples?

LDR couples are really just that … couples.
If you’re in a long distance relationship, you probably have some sort of 50-50 chance of success vs. failure. According to physician and long distance relationship expert Gregory Guldner, LDR couples don’t suffer from broken hearts as a result of geography any more than couples who live together or near each other.

Happy LDR couples also reported the same high levels of commitment, trust and satisfaction as other couples. This was discovered in a study conducted by Guldner of 400 couples, 50% of whom were LDRs. This result was echoed by similar studies.

It’s the relationship, stupid.
The Guldner research also showed that the frequency and length with which LDR couples meet isn’t much of a factor. What matters, according to Guldner, is that LDR couples communicate well and often. There is also no evidence that LDR couples stray more than other couples, although they are more likely to fret about the possibility of their partner succumbing to another person’s charms because of the distance.

However, as in most relationships, it is trust that matters and the willingness of people to keep the flame burning. Interestingly, the more optimistic people were, the better their long distance relationship lasted. It also seems easier for couples to maintain a long distance relationship if their priorities are in place and their expectations are realistic. Younger couples who want to settle down, for example, may be ineffective in long distance relationships.

Surviving the LDR
If you’re in a long distance relationship, so are approximately 7 million Americans (sschwartz@thegazette.canwest.com). As people’s lives change and as work and family styles continue to evolve, so will relationships. LDR couples may have to deal with the challenge of keeping in touch in spite of the distance but they are just like other couples dealing with the same kind of issues all couples face on a daily basis. In the end, it’s really not a question of distance but whether or not your hearts are in the right place.